I Am Mine

Oct 4

Oct 4 To Write or Not To Write? That Was Always the Question.

Growing up my parents always told me that I had a vivid imagination and that I was great at storytelling. Duh, they’re my parents they’re supposed to tell me that I'm awesome and the greatest human being alive. JK but seriously all parents do this, so they weren’t really the best source for inspiration or self confidence at the time. Later in life, while I was in High School and College and I would forward any essays or special articles I had written for my mom to go over (yes I had my mom read over my HW all the way through college), she would continue to tell me to write, to express my unique voice, and even though I always knew there was a part of me that actually wanted to do that, I would simply reply with “Who is ever going to read anything that I write?”

Forward a few years into the story (I graduated college 4 years ago), and here I am, sitting at a La Colombe Coffee in my new neighborhood, being basic AF with an Iced Cappuccino and a Jean Jacket writing my first ever blog post. To be completely honest, I am still terrified of doing this. Being that english is my second language, I have certain doubts about my grammar and whether or not people will enjoy my POV, but as an exercise on my quest for self discovery and happiness I have decided not to let my insecurities get in the way of something I’ve been wanting to do for a while, and that is writing.

I want this blog to serve as an outlet, a place for understanding, for growth, self love and also a place to talk about happy things, adventure, lifestyle, and obviously include many many pictures! It is very scary to throw my thoughts and feelings online. I am guilty of showcasing only my best moments and best self on social media, and with my writing I want to simply be real, BE ME. Life has amazing moments and these are to be celebrated and shown to the world. Life also has tough days, and these shall be embraced because they help us grow and shape us into better human beings.

I still ask myself if there is anyone other than my mom who will ever read this (with a million blogs online, I’m guessing it will take a while, and even then who knows maybe I’m not interesting enough), but who cares. I will not remain in my shell because of fear of the unknown, fear of being or not being popular, fear of the so many “what ifs” in life. If I want to go ahead and write my feelings, in what some might consider extremely conversational english and bad grammar, I say “why not?”

Now, do I have anything specific I want to share with the world today, on my very first blog post ever? Not really… but as I have promised myself to be genuine and to speak what I feel and about who I am, I might as well start by diving a little deeper into who is Maritza (very on the surface still), and by accepting the real me you will get to know me a little better as well.

20 very entertaining facts about me!

I was born in New York.
I grew up in Cartagena, Colombia, moved to Boston for college, and post college lived in Los Angeles, and went to USC for my Masters. Now I'm back in the city that saw me break out of my mothers womb.
Im 26 years old.
Im scared of being 26 and not really knowing what I want to do with my life or where i see myself in the next 5 years, when I will be 31!
Im terrified of death, or maybe it's the suffering part that I associate with it.
I had an eating disorder in the past, and I still struggle with food and self confidence; but in the process of self love and self discovery I have found that I actually LOVE food, cooking, taking pictures of food and call myself a foodie.
My drink of choice is red wine. My faves include Malbec, Cabernet and Carmenere. When Alcohol is not involved, I'm all about sparkling water with lime.
I consider myself a shy person, and find it easier to talk to complete strangers rather than friends or friends of friends (I know, im weird).
I love dogs. Nahla, a POM and Canela, a Chihuahua are my babies.
I tried the fitness thing, ran a marathon and then figured out I was doing it for the wrong reasons aka Weight Loss and fitting into stereotypes. Now I love to take care of myself, eat right, exercise but prioritize my mental well being and happiness.
I am upfront and speak my mind, some people really don’t like that.
I have 7 tattoos, probably want 3 more.
I love fashion as a form of self expression.
I love to dance, secretly wish I were a dancer on DWTS (not so secret anymore).
I love to walk with headphones on and feel like my life has an ongoing soundtrack... there is a lot of Regaetton in the soundtrack of my life.
At some point in my life I want to live in Paris (then the panic of being 26 and when am I ever going to be able to do this kicks back in).
I played the violin for 12 years, regret not playing anymore, but learning the guitar is next on the bucket list.
Growing up, I used to think that by the time I was 28 I would be married and expecting…. ummm the swiping game is not really going strong.
Regardless of the many unknowns, I feel more myself at 26 than ever before.
I have decided that the things I do in life, I will do for me. I promise to make myself proud of the person staring back in the mirror and to love every inch of me and every step of my journey.